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I am watching with amusement a local business development group attempting to rally around the same goal but with minimal success. The reason I am amused is because of the words they are choosing to use in describing each others needs and their own perceptions. They are further insulting each other without meaning to. This is something I recognize in the outside world all of the time. Most of our issues are a matter of semantics. We don't disagree as much as we perceive. We just don't choose the correct words to a.) state what we mean and b.) get what we want.
A Case Study
For example, the situation I am watching involves several groups attempting to develop business around a core industry. Each group plays a particular role, some with more power to outwardly direct the industry and others with just as much if not more power but less so in the actual development. The word “weak” was used to describe the later group in a heated conversation. I laughed out loud and clutched my heart at the same time. You don't insult the ones you are looking to for support even if “weak” is a valid description in a particular situation. Identifying them as having a different stake in the issue would have been a better move.
Here are four ways to use words more effectively.
Listen, listen, listen and listen some more. Listen to them and yourself and put yourself in the shoes of the other. Would you want to be referred to as weak? I think not. Consider words that are more balancing. If needed use a dictionary but stay within the bounds of normal language for the topic.
Don't respond immediately. This is so difficult to follow but one of the best pieces of advice anyone ever gave me. Wait, smile, and wait some more. Do you really have something to contribute or do you think you gain power by saying just anything? Or worse yet, do you just need to hear yourself speak?
Return to the issues. When words have been misunderstood the best way to diffuse is to return to the issues at hand. Do you know what they are and have they been identified before the discussion started?
Keep up. Sounds silly but if you are speaking to a broad audience do you understand the real issues? Are you aware of the world and its changing vernacular? We can get side tracked as we age and wake up one day to discover the world has changed under our feet. Make an effort to understand what someone is attempting to convey and where their points of reference might be staked.
I am not one for watering down language—George Carlin has my respect in many ways. Say what you mean don't speak to be mean. Choosing words carefully can mean the difference between building bridges or creating unnecessary oceans.
Showing posts with label strategy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label strategy. Show all posts
Living A Lie? Stop Now - Weekly Tarot Horoscopes
September 24 - September 30
Thoughts on living through the eyes of a tarot reader:
- There is no energy shortage, just the need to rethink how we gather and use energy. This applies to our transportation and homes as well as our own bodies.
- Just because everyone else is doing it doesn’t mean you have to. In fact, it’s a good reason not to.
- Every day is a brand new day, with brand new opportunities.
- Sleeping is an opportunity to resolve personal issues.
- Limitation can be very helpful if you put it in perspective. Use it to direct your thoughts and energy toward a goal.
- You are responsible for how you act and respond and not for how others act and respond.
- The physical world is a manifestation of spirit. Events that are detrimental have arrived at that stage because of ill-formed thinking and reasoning.
- Change happens whether you want it to or not. Don’t try to stop it, just make sure you know what you want from it and direct change toward that.
- Every single one of us has the power to make change in our lives. If you find yourself consistently making excuses or blaming others then you need to stop and take responsibility. First you must stop and listen.
- Knowing why doesn’t mean you use the why as an excuse. Once you know why, move on and make change.
- The only thing stopping you is you and the direction and structure you have chosen for your thoughts.
- We never achieve anything in a vacuum. Help is abundant if you learn to recognize it when it appears. And, again, plastic isn't money so think twice before you see it as help.
- People don’t die, their bodies do. Their spirit lives on and so do the works the spirit creates during the time in a body. Are you creating something of benefit? Making people smile is beneficial and it doesn’t have a price tag.
Thoughts on living through the eyes of a tarot reader:
- There is no energy shortage, just the need to rethink how we gather and use energy. This applies to our transportation and homes as well as our own bodies.
- Just because everyone else is doing it doesn’t mean you have to. In fact, it’s a good reason not to.
- Every day is a brand new day, with brand new opportunities.
- Sleeping is an opportunity to resolve personal issues.
- Limitation can be very helpful if you put it in perspective. Use it to direct your thoughts and energy toward a goal.
- You are responsible for how you act and respond and not for how others act and respond.
- The physical world is a manifestation of spirit. Events that are detrimental have arrived at that stage because of ill-formed thinking and reasoning.
- Change happens whether you want it to or not. Don’t try to stop it, just make sure you know what you want from it and direct change toward that.
- Every single one of us has the power to make change in our lives. If you find yourself consistently making excuses or blaming others then you need to stop and take responsibility. First you must stop and listen.
- Knowing why doesn’t mean you use the why as an excuse. Once you know why, move on and make change.
- The only thing stopping you is you and the direction and structure you have chosen for your thoughts.
- We never achieve anything in a vacuum. Help is abundant if you learn to recognize it when it appears. And, again, plastic isn't money so think twice before you see it as help.
- People don’t die, their bodies do. Their spirit lives on and so do the works the spirit creates during the time in a body. Are you creating something of benefit? Making people smile is beneficial and it doesn’t have a price tag.
At A Standstill? Blocked By The Boss? - Weekly Tarot Horoscopes
April 9 - April 15
The cards speak this week to an inordinate amount of feelings of being blinded or blocked in movement. Gauntlets and fine lines abound to be walked, danced, and rolled across. Here’s how I deal with situations like these.
Whether you are blocked or blinded you are generally feeling unable to move forward or in any direction you may think you need to go. Granted, someone may have decided they don’t want you to achieve movement and actually blocked you or it could be due to your own devices that you find yourself in a stand still. Truly it doesn’t matter which it is and here is why. Finding yourself at a standstill is an opportunity to stop and take a look around. (Warning: This may not work for race car drivers or anyone in the process of moving very fast. But you knew that, right?) Really, look around you, re-examine your situation and reformulate if you find you need to. If someone is blocking you then the ability to look around you can be used to your advantage – they actually have put you in the drivers seat. These are opportunities to regroup and get stronger if you choose to perceive them that way. Then again, maybe it’s all in your head. Perception is based on your own experiences and beliefs. Change those or re-arrange them and perceptions change.
All in all it’s a week of lists, traffic and delays. Find something to distract you or give yourself more downtime than usual. Keep your thoughts looking forward!
The cards speak this week to an inordinate amount of feelings of being blinded or blocked in movement. Gauntlets and fine lines abound to be walked, danced, and rolled across. Here’s how I deal with situations like these.
Whether you are blocked or blinded you are generally feeling unable to move forward or in any direction you may think you need to go. Granted, someone may have decided they don’t want you to achieve movement and actually blocked you or it could be due to your own devices that you find yourself in a stand still. Truly it doesn’t matter which it is and here is why. Finding yourself at a standstill is an opportunity to stop and take a look around. (Warning: This may not work for race car drivers or anyone in the process of moving very fast. But you knew that, right?) Really, look around you, re-examine your situation and reformulate if you find you need to. If someone is blocking you then the ability to look around you can be used to your advantage – they actually have put you in the drivers seat. These are opportunities to regroup and get stronger if you choose to perceive them that way. Then again, maybe it’s all in your head. Perception is based on your own experiences and beliefs. Change those or re-arrange them and perceptions change.
All in all it’s a week of lists, traffic and delays. Find something to distract you or give yourself more downtime than usual. Keep your thoughts looking forward!
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